Ode to a Clean Refrigerator (or Look Who's Crying Over Spilled Milk)

Spring Cleaning forced itself upon me yesterday when the top shelf of our refrigerator dropped on one side, upsetting the pitcher containing the recently opened 1.33 litre bag of milk (oh how I miss screw-capped milk jugs!). Milk quickly drenched the second and third shelf items, seeped into the crisper drawer and puddled on the floor of the fridge. To make matters worse, the dangling shelf upset a can of black beans that my beloved had opened less than an hour before while making me a tasty mid-morning wrap, spilling black bean juice that flowed along the second shelf and ran down to the third shelf. The bottoms of many bottles, cans and other containers of food were engulfed by either milk, black bean juice, or both. Ugh!

On the bright side, the refrigerator was long overdue to be cleared of the detritus that settles upon all but the obsessive-compulsive clean freaks, so the end results of the clean up, which entailed removing everything from the shelves and crisper drawers, was gratifying. The down side was that with my blood pressure looming so high of late this was chore that was risky as well as gross. The experience inspired me to write this poem today:

Ode to a Clean Refrigerator

Legumes languishing fuzzily in opaque cottage cheese
Containers so carefully washed for reuse join the
Dried husks of once-broccoli and the slimy remains of
Lettuce putrefying beneath a bag of carrots in the dreaded
Crisper drawer, decaying remnants of forgotten meals,
Exiled to the compost heap of life.
Worm food.

Gleaming chrome, sparkling glass shelves, and brilliantly white molded
Surfaces bask in the glory of redemption from
Sticky residues of opened jars carelessly set and
Spatters of unknown origin defiling the Clean, embedded with
Particles drawn in on currents filled with motes and fur,
Wiped away by my unwilling hand.
House work.
-----

From now on our milk will be transferred to a screw-capped jug--no more plastic bags with the tips cut off, waiting to topple and drench the contents of the refrigerator. (A quick Google search let me know that I'm not the only one annoyed by Canadian milk bags). Also, my beloved has promised to refrain from setting opened cans of beans or other foods in the fridge--he will cooperate in storing the food in sealed plastic containers, preferably clear ones to enable us to view their contents. Hopefully there will be no more crying over spilled milk...or other liquids...in the refrigerator!

For an interesting article about milk, including history, production, varieties, distribution (including packaging!), and culture aspects, take a look at this Wikipedia offering.

And for a fairly brief yet comprehensive history of the refrigerator see The History of the Refrigerator: The Cold Truth and Hard Facts, by Marjorie Dorfman at House Not So Beautiful "where dirt and chaos reign supreme". Sounds like home, except, for the moment, my clean refrigerator.

So it goes.