Friday, October 12, 2012
I get quite a few spam comments and so have had to disallow comments on several posts. I'm not sure why I even keep this blog, since I so seldom post anything on it, except that I'm too lazy to go through the posts to save stuff I don't want to delete.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
1. Wear your glasses. To make sure your partner is actually in the bed.
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, In case you doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.
6. Use extra polygrip so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.
8. Make all the noise you want... The neighbors are deaf too.
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news!!
10. Don't even think about trying it twice.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, 'Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!'
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!
He went home and told his wife, Mary, 'I won the prize for the best toast of the night.'
She said, 'Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?'
John said, 'Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife.'
'Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!' Mary said.
The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner.
The man chuckled leeringly and said, 'John won the prize the other night at
the pub with a toast about you, Mary...'
She said, 'Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come.'